Before, I needed someone who could comfort me in my pain or, perversely, inflict it. I sought both extremes. The comfort of love, sharing it to escape my grief, or the denial of myself through submission. In that submission, I could escape my grief through body chemical induced narcosis. The relationship I have with myself is being… Continue reading Relationships Revisited
At last, could it be; that I am escaping the need that has crippled my days for so long? In its undertow, I swam, ignoring the warmth of a bank; where safety and security offered respite: instead being led, by the current, towards play. One week ago, for the first time; my body overwhelmed by the pain and… Continue reading Escaping the need
Confidence grows, my feet take steps forwards as I shed my need for approval. My insecurities and anxieties in relation to my identity have been challenged by my adventures. I am beginning to sense a wider realm of opportunities to interact with warm, loving adults. In fact, I am a ship on an ocean, I fish,… Continue reading A Fortnight of Adventures
I spend time on Facebook and Twitter. These are places where, in the main, body positivity is embraced. I believe that all bodies should be celebrated, that no matter your body shape you are … Source: Body positive: internet vs reality
Ice cracks as my skin warms, Thawing, My heart begins to pump harder, I rise to stake my claim on this life. She floored me, When she twisted my mind out of this body, When she turned my love against me, I died. Her secret was to capture and to take, She took my love… Continue reading Recovery
When you are vulnerable, the anxiety you have about others creates a barrier to being at ease with them. I’ve often felt that my kindness was all that people would like in me. As someone with low self esteem, I’ve been critical of all of the other parts of my individuality. In love, I’ve tried… Continue reading Habits in connection
I am 52 and I am someone who has struggled with my adult identity and has experienced PTSD. My child; my younger self, was damaged by domestic turbulence and as an adult, I have carried my child with me, living to protect him. The fear I carried has shaped my response to the individuals around me… Continue reading Who am I?